ytd at xinyi's hse was enjoyable. met up wif her at bedok at 8 plus, nearly lost. bought ingredients and we were both broke la. 24 bucks lor. headed to her hse straight. watched tv till 10 plus b4 we decided to TRY to study, and so, our attempt to try to study failed. kp turning and watching tv when she went to bath, talked when she came back. soon it was 12 plus and we decided to slp. worried tt i can't wake up, so repeatedly asked her MUST wake me up. woke up at 4.30, luckily managed to complete everything in time. i helped to prepare the sushi, and she prepared the stuffed cheese hotdog prata. hers was definitely much more tedious den mine. quickly packed everything, and left for sch. its the first time i went to a fren's hse overnight and going to sch todae. somemore its at bedok. reached sch just in time. quite fun todae. with the aces dance, watching the yr ones perform their special aces, going back to class and stuffing ourselves wif food, as well as the performance. so sad not one of our teachers got the award. and they nvr even wore the shirt tt we gave them. =( totally no mood aft the whole program ended though, so left home wif karen. talked and i felt better aft tt. still in hol mood though.

screwed up GP. lol. nvr mind. later going xinyi's hse to help her with the food for teacher's dae. hope i will really be able to help, and not a hindrance. haaha. what tricia told us really shocked me la. i cannot imagine at all. he seems to be so normal, or is it a rumour? eyeer, i get goosebumps whenever i tink of it. not tt i'm discriminating, but its getting more and more common, and i see it quite often. shall not comment anymore, they have their right to be like tt. can't blame them. saw my dearest laopo, vonne yesterdae! i didn't noe she was calling out for me, i just heard some gal shouting and screaming so loudly and i was tinking wah shout so loud. den i saw her running towards me and i was omg, cfm is her liao. coz she is forever so loud! LOL.
though i was really happy to see her but was too shocked to have any reaction. finally saw who yikai was, but only his back view. so wasted! quite skinny, quite tall, ok la, not bad. so she dragged me here and dere, and left for home. chatted a lot. hahas. teacher's dae they going back. shld i go too? but i dunno why i'm going back for, definitely not to look for teachers, coz i'm not really close wif them, guess only going back for a meet up wif the gals. but i'm afraid i will spend a lot of time wif them, end up not studying. i'm in a dilemma. aiya, nvr mind about tt, will decide later.

went downstairs to buy breakfast for my mummy and sis. was in the lift with a very cute little boy. tink he knows me, so i smiled at him. and he suddenly just ran to me and hugged me! omg, i was so overwhelmed, i started to pinch his cheeks and ruffled his hair. and he played around with me. i left, and he kpt saying bye all the way and i could still hear his voice when the lift door closed. hahas. omg, i lurve children la!

totally pissed off yesterday. they nvr tell me tt mummy nvr prepared dinner, and i had nothing to eat when i reached home. asked them to buy smthg back for me. and they had to kp picking on me while eating, he even threatened me ask me not to eat. as if i care, i was too angry to continue eating. why force me to sae smthg i dun like! and i dun see any great change or difference in me. he had to kp scolding me. so i just went back to my room and cried like shit. idiot. i feel so vulnerable and weak these few weeks. maybe coz of my results and other things tt accumulate. starting a cold war soon. i can sense it.

mugging in sch till 9 everydae for the past wk. not realli effective. i nvr completed what i intended to. got back chem mock exam, terrible, i pulled down the percentage for the whole class. laugh at me for all i care. saw the same bunch of ppl mugging everydae. motivate me ppl. LOL. yesterdae was really raining so heavily, asked daddy to send me home. terence hitched a ride, and i was afraid tt he will get the wrong idea, luckily.

i'm realli tired, tired of everything. sometimes i just wished tt i can dun care and just leave it like tt. but i can't. sick.

back frm marina! the fireworks were fantastic! its definitely better than those on national day, much more special and more varieties. the colours, the shimmerings,sound effects, everything was great. but too bad, cos it was too crowded, we couldn't really catch a good view, but still visible. went for dinner, and as usual, ppl were fighting again. maybe drunkards. back home. out the whole day. tml oso. can't study. how can i finish up the hmwk by tml. mdm chitra demands such high standards of work, and she wants unique styles. i dun think i can ever reach her expectations or level. and GP compre, as well as econs test on tues.

realli shit.

went for the econs seminar at SP todae, with xinyi,hidaya and raymond.

saw jieying!

Singapore Property Market was the most interesting, the lecturer was the clearest in his speech. Followed by Exchange Rate policy by Peter Wilsons, obviously i couldn't really absorb everything what he said. its such a waste. i thought his speech was the most relevant to what we are learning right now. Asian Financial Crisis was like completely inaudible, i couldn't process what he said a single bit. he was talking way too fast! Raymond and xinyi said tt the NUS talk tea reception was much better.lolx. and i was totally pissed with an MI girl. she was so rude la! can't we share the table? Mind you, it was so BIG la. so selfish of you. and you still dare to say it so loudly in front of us. tsk. no manners la you. nvr mind, we are gracious enough to let you have tt pathetic table ALL for urself. self-centred.

nvr mind bout her. we were talking bout xinyi's cousin who got all As and still cried. den hidaya said cos she nvr got a B.LOL. haha. raymond was brave to ask a qn, but i suppose the lecturer didn't really understand him. everything ended at 12 plus. went home. nice weather for sleeping in. and i slept for 3 solid hours.DEAD. should have been studying.

out for dinner with sis. ate at macs. coz other places were fully packed. i was a bit remorseful tt i seemed a bit pissed with a guy at long john. but seriously, he wasn't being gentlemanly at all. went arcade and my two sisters enjoyed themselves totally. i was fascinated by the huge candy machines though. i poked a fries into her mcspicy and dipped some curry sauce and its perfect as a b'dae cake. a bit pathetic la. but still can make it. in the end, the hole was so big. and i was being unglam coz they said i was eating too xi wen liao. funny, and a guy saw it. i was totally embarrassed lor. LOL. and mum and sis bought a bolster for her. and a card and a pair of earrings. NOT FAIR LOR. i dun even have this kind of treatment on my birthdae. LOL.


its weird tt we dun even sae hi anymore. and even ignore each other when we walk past. what happened, i dun realli know. because of tt someone, maybe. but i felt a tinge of relieve when i found out tt . .

unlucky dae today.tsk tsk.

met up wif mavis early in the morn at 8 o'clock. headed for mac to study first.shared a meal so tt we will not be chased out. again, we talked and talked till nvr really do anything. den decided to go wait at woodlands lib. saw jasmine and beth, ANGER( like finally) and ligang again. lolx. waited and waited, who knows suddenly everyone started leaving. so weird, den jasmine's fren told her lib would only open at 1PM. like wth? i was happily waiting for it to open and thought at last i would be able to study aft so many days of slacking. and they had to open at 1PM?? i was pekchek again la. but no choice. decided to go westmall coffee bean. SAW KAREN, CAROL AND TZE! but we decided to go lib and guess what? closed again lor! they had some staff annual event. so went burger king instead. finally, we settled down to study. and i dunno why i find burger king a bit weird. we ordered green tea large and they gave a bottle green tea which only cost 1 plus outside but they sold at 2 plus. somemore the indian guy was like smiling all the way, i dunno if its just being polite or sniggering at us instead. like xiao li cang dao. den mavis sae he disturbed her oso. lolx.and damn suay we couldn't open the cap aft so many attempts. palms were rubbed red. i managed to study just a little bit la. better den slping at hm.

HAPPY 17TH B'DAE SIS!!
gg out to have dinner wif birthdae gurl later.

seriously, i have to find a solution for my prob. i really want to study till 9 in sch badly.i noe i can't go home, i will not study at home, i will only use com and watch tv and stone and sleep. whatever it is, i must stay away from home whenever i can. but i dunno how to solve tt recurring prob. its haunting me everydae. i have to forgo my chance of going to a university, having a great future and earning big bucks. my dream is getting further and further away. the only thing is to study hard now, and i can't even do this simple task. they dun take me seriously, thy just brush away the topic when i raise it to them. i dun think they understand.i noe they are not giving me any stress, even if i can't go uni its okay with them. BUT ITS NOT OKAY WITH ME! i am very afraid of leading a miserable life.

i dun think i will eveer have a perfect solution to my prob.

i wasted the whole of todae. nvr studied at all. when other ppl have alrdy revised for a lot of topics. and i'm still stuck with hmwk.wth.'A's getting nearer.i'm dreading it, but still no motivation to study yet. lots of probs haven solved.

probs not solved=not studying.

i'm forever procrasticating.

i realli cannot take it anymore. i realli cannot take it le. i can't believe my own bro did tt to me. i hate him.i seriously hate him.i just feel like killing him.he's realli the source of my trouble.everytime i wan to use my com for my hmwk and stuff, he has to snatch it.and he's STUPID reason is he wanna play. like what shit la.u realli SUX LIKE HELL. go die la.i dun care other ppl calling me evil or what. u dunno what he did to me so dun comment.let everyone noe he sux. i dun give a damn. i just feel like running away from home and getting away from him. when i see him i just feel like going up to KILL HIM. because of him i have to go home early to look aft my sis and not allowed to study in sch when my A levels are coming.what the hell is tt.all he has to do is to scold vulgarities and start scolding everyone at home and everyone has to listen to him.u think u very big ah. u are just some stupid chao ah beng trying to act big.stupid gangster.u think u noe how to scold i dunno meh. everytime run out of stupid reasons den wanna fight.or always insist tt u are in the right when EVEN PIGS NOE ITS WRONG. dun tink i dun dare to take action.i just dun wan mum and dad to worry. U JUST FUCK OFF LA. i am seriously angry now, no one can stop me.vulgar post i dun care, anything i also dun care. I REALLI WAN TO DIE. i cannot stand it.someone just tell me what to do. i wan to leave home but i cannot. i HATE HIM TO THE CORE.I NVR HATE SOMEONE SO MUCH B4. i am seriously at a loss. i wanna die.i realli wan to.

thanks mavis for trying to cheer me up. i will be okay after a while. and the ms swan movies realli made me laugh. thanks a lot. i appreciate it.

Last night at victoria theatre was great. nice to see my former pri sch getting better and better.
and my sis performing Latin Line Dance.so funny.lolx.

NATIONAL CELEBRATION! which means 4 and a half days of no sch! yeah!

actually shld'nt have gone to sch todae. coz i tot mavis would be alone,so i decided to go. den dunno why suddenly hidaya going with us oso.so i was the extra.and i didn't noe wad to do.if i go back, i certainly would become a laughing stock for the rest, esp tt enemy.and if i stayed dere, i would feel so thickskinned and guilty, and i was so afraid tt the teacher would ask me to alight and go back. but she was only a bit shocked but still allowed me to stay on board.den we arrived at chinatown point. headed to find Ann Xiang Hill Park. found it quite easily with hidaya and mavis around. den we went to walk through the park and it was realli ulu.scary cats roaming round.den walked back to somewhere more obvious where our class would be able to find us.den finally set off to find all the ans to the VERY diff qns. but we were still able to solve them all.i didn't do much, they were great. oh, and MR YEE TREATED US TO MAC! THANKS MR YEE! finished up the collage and off to NLB. dismissed and left for bugis street and shopped for my sis pressie.bought a billabong waterbottle and a chain of tiny erasers for my smaller sis. and i saw NAT!OMG.and HONG DOU TOO. its only for a short while la, so nvr mind. studied at NLB for a while b4 heading home. I SAW LIGANG! he tapped me and talked to me. he's so friendly la.lolx.

i guess this may be our last class gathering, other than prom. its enjoyable, wif beth grabbing the breasts of the samsui woman so audaciously.its like damn funny la. i bet the samsui woman feels violated though she's just a statue. i was laughing like nobody's business. and raymond suddenly said about the seminar thing.which i didn't noe. and still hav to pay $8 lor.but nvr mind, more exposure is good.

I am SICK.as what i expected.coz i had flu and my throat was so uncomfortable for days. headache oso.now i'm having a fever.sian.i hate being sick, i can't study at all.piles of hmwk waiting for me to complete. and i missed two impt tests todae.chem and econs. hav to retake sometime later.going to victoria theatre for my sis performance later. hope i wun distub a lot of people with my constant sniffing and sneezing.lolx.

went capitol building wif mum and sis.signed a package.we had to coz they were so persuasive.grabbed lunch at some thai restaurant.the food is realli cheap. we were going to take the train when a guy approached us.to persuade us to sign up for some emergency courses.so i decided to just sign up and mummy was forced to.the guy was so friendly,kp asking qns and stuff.lolx. went back to cck.wanted to buy a new hp but postponed it to next time ba.feel bad spending a lot of money.but dere's still lots of things to buy.

heard a lot of ppl may not be going for prom.actually we shouldn't haven gone too.its so ex.but since whole class is going, it should be quite fun.i suppose.

realise its been long since i updated.nothing much happened.except i got lots of bites on my arms.ms goh was absent last fri so mr bryan lim took over.i was asking suhaimi for medicated oil and he heard it and brought it for me.so nice! and mr yip wanted to see me.as what i had expected.but i was a bit taken aback coz he was so serious.lolx.

Todae is NOT productive at all.learnt nothing in sch.not paying attention and so sleepy.dunno why.sian.continue like dis and i'm dead.decided not to study in sch.no mood.so went off to meet KGANG! they going kbox but i'm not.just for awhile to see them.and i sang two songs wif them.memories.huggies b4 leaving,except karen coz i c her everydae.is she dun wan not me.hahas.nearly fell when jas hugged me.so funny.the floor a bit slippery la.lolx.

tml out wif mum.yay!